Why is Astarion so hard to romance?

▶

Astarion is a complex character in Baldur’s Gate 3, and romancing him requires a deep understanding of his personality, desires, and boundaries, making it a challenging but rewarding experience for players. To successfully romance Astarion, players must navigate his push-pull dynamic, where he can be pleased or displeased by dialogue choices, often involving provoking and lying to other characters, which can lead to morally questionable decisions.

Understanding Astarion’s Complexity

Astarion’s romance is not straightforward, and players must be willing to manipulate and trick him to build a relationship, which can be daunting for some players. His approval rating plays a significant role in determining the success of the romance, and players must make choices that align with his values and desires.

Frequently Asked Questions

General Questions

1. Why can’t I romance Astarion?: To trigger Astarion’s romance scene in Act 3, you must have finished his companion quest, which involves taking down his master Cazador.
2. Does Astarion break up with you?: Players can pick whichever option they feel suits how they want their relationship with Astarion to be, and picking options that manipulate Astarion into having sex with you simply for pleasure will be followed by a cutscene where Astarion breaks up with the player.
3. Is Astarion easy to romance?: Some characters are easier to unlock romances with than others; one of the easier people to connect with is the vampire elf named Astarion.

Romance and Relationships

4. How do you romance Astarion on a good run?: You can support him in his desire to use the mind flayer tadpole to his advantage, and you’ll also please him by assisting the goblins in the goblin camp.
5. Can you romance Astarion without letting him bite you?: You’ll then see a romance scene between you and Astarion, and during the scene, you can choose to let Astarion bite you or not.
6. Can you romance Astarion if you don’t sleep with him?: Doing a good playthrough with him is fun, and you don’t need to sleep with him at the party to begin romancing him.

Approval and Gifts

7. How do you know if Astarion likes you?: As you begin to romance Astarion, you can check up his approval rating of you on the character sheet, and the goal is to gain high approval.
8. How to make Astarion love you?: Astarion’s approval list includes supporting his desires, being supportive of his nature and condition, and aligning yourself with creatures of evil nature.
9. Should you let Astarion feed on you?: If you plan to make Astarion a permanent part of your party, you should consider letting him suck your blood for the Happy buff.

Story and Consequences

10. Is it bad to let Astarion ascend?: Despite being vocally grateful to you, he will quickly become much more arrogant and power-hungry, even noting in the following conversation his desire to subjugate the world.
11. Can you have a happy ending with Astarion?: Alternatively, going for the morally good ending and keeping Astarion as a Vampire Spawn opens the potential for a DLC centered around helping him stand sunlight again.

Character Interactions

12. Does Astarion like the dark urge?: Astarion sympathizes with Dark Urge and their struggles very much and is very supportive.
13. Can you romance Astarion if you save the Grove?: As of Act 1, there is only one opportunity to get involved with Astarion romantically and carnally. !
14. Can you romance Astarion with fair approval?: “Fair” is good enough to start the romance at the tiefling party later on, if you make the right choices at the party itself.
15. Should you ask Astarion about his scars?: Apparently, you should always ask Astarion about his scar for the scar-reading scene to appear.